What a night. That about sums it up for the first week of the New Year (along with the last few weeks of 2010) for Ryan and me. It seems that after many months of sleeping harmoniously throughout the night Lilah has converted to night owlish behavior and refuses to sleep. On most nights, it’s tolerable at best but last night was one of the worst nights we have ever had (sleep wise) with her. I feel guilty even typing that but it’s true... I can only think of one other time she was literally up the entire night. Every half an hour or so Lilah woke up screaming in pain yelling, “Ow” or “No” repeatedly. Every half hour. All night long. With no temperature and no other outward signs of illness we simply just comforted her and would cuddle her back to sleep. Just as I would finally start to fall asleep the crying and screaming and thrashing would start again.
Having a child has definitely taken a toll on our sleep patterns but overall I think we adjusted pretty quickly to the transition. I realize that the days of sleeping in until ten.. (Even eight thirty or nine would be wonderful) are long gone and normally I handle this with gusto but I must admit today I am struggling to get by. My eyes play sneaky tricks on me; closing as I try to cope with the rather mundane task of changing company numbers on roughly ninety five employees... my head pounds with the beats of a night spent awake, comforting a restless and sometimes hysterical little girl. My ears are doing that thing where voices seem miles away and more than once I have spaced out in the middle of a conversation. What I wouldn’t give to put on my most comfortable pajama pants and crawl into bed, blissfully sleeping the day away.
On top of the tired foggy bubble that is no doubt holding my body hostage I am also struggling with an overbearing sentiment of worry. Why, after so many months of sleeping through the night, is Lilah waking so abruptly? Is it night terrors, growing pains, tummy aches, did something on the TV scare her? Is it simply a phase she is going through- determined not to have to spend the night in her own bed? I just don’t know and above all the lost sleep this is what truly bothers me the most. Once the night was over and she was dressed for the morning she more than willingly flung back a smile or two as she put her arms through her jacket and headed out the door to start her day, no evidence left of the wakeful episodes of the night before.
Hopefully tonight will be a great turn around of events and we will all get some much desired sleep.. in the meantime I think I will grab another cup of coffee..